Where does trusting yourself start?
Where does trusting yourself start?
For a big chunk of my life, I have struggled with my relationship with food.
This took on many different masks, but it was my way of seeking control in my life and coping with overwhelming emotions.
Moving through a big healing journey around this a few years ago, changed my life.
I stopped binge eating and started to love my body more.
But as I grew and my life shifted in so many ways, I still kept on the same story looping in my mind.
This story of not being able to trust myself.
I hadn't been able to trust myself with food.
I couldn't trust myself when looking in the mirror and seeing what I saw or with the way, I treated my body and myself.
‘It's a big process to change a belief or a story in our head.’
It's a big process to change a belief or a story in our head.
How do we shift these things we automatically think, because they seem so ingrained in our being?
I feel like this question has been the biggest one for me over the years. And still, I am learning about it every day.
How my own mental limitations can be the largest barriers and the biggest enemies in my life.
My best friend shared with me the other day something beautiful that shifted something for me.
She shared how helpful it could be, when changing our ingrained patterns, to embody another character. A certain chosen persona who carries characteristics that you wish to have. Someone who believes this new story you want to believe.
She told me how much easier it is to not try to shift the story from yourself and all you identify with. But when we embody this new character, we can step into it with much more ease and grace.
This character doesn't have to have the same life experiences, memories, traits, circumstances, or perspectives. They can be whoever you make them to be.
‘I called mine Sarah‘
I called mine Sarah.
She feels like a parent to me.
Like this wise strong mother who is keeping the little child safe in her arms.
She's completely focused on bringing stability, care, and safety to me.
She's carrying the belief of trust in herself.
So instead of forcing this new story upon ourselves and shaking our heads in disbelief, because we have so many internal voices screaming why this is untrue to us, we can practice a new belief.
Put it on, like we would wear a new dress or sweater. See how it feels upon your skin, as the material feels unfamiliar yet comfortable.
And from that embodiment, we act, we feel, we think these new thoughts.
It's like this game:'What would ... do?' and we get to think what this new persona with this new belief would do or say or feel.
I wrote it down. Specific topics where I doubt myself sometimes and I asked: 'What would Sarah do?' and wrote everything down.
How much clarity comes from detaching like this...
And with clarity and detail, we get to act focused.
So it becomes easier to try something new.
And over time, these new actions, bring about evidence that strengthens this new belief in our system.
Our focus shifts, our mind changes and we become the person we dreamed about.
How is the topic of trust for you? I would love to hear from you!
Love,
Iza
