How to make decisions when you have conflicting needs
Quick summary
Name the needs
Check the urgency of each need
Note how important each need is
Make a decision that takes all your needs into account
Reassess as your needs and priorities change
In case you’re done with hearing to just “fill your own cup” but have no idea how to actually do that in a world that pulls you in all sorts of directions, I want to share my personal 3-step trick for giving myself what I need.
It’s been incredibly helpful for me as a former people-please queen. 👸
What used to keep me stuck was feeling like I had two needs or desires at the same time that seemed incompatible.
3-Step trick to make decisions when you have conflicting needs
Seth Godin shared a story on the DOAC podcast about a donkey that is both hungry and thirsty, but can’t choose between going to the water or the food. It eventually dies of starvation and thirst in the middle.
Seth Godin at Diary of a CEO
We are multifaceted beings, so we’re going to have different needs and wants that don’t always go together.
I use these 3 steps, based on the Eisenhower Matrix:
Name the needs
Check the urgency: How urgent is each need from 1-10? (10 being very, very urgent)
Note the importance: How important is each need to you?
I use them all the freaking time.
To decide whether I’m too tired and need to go home or want to keep dancing for another hour.
To check whether I need the evening off or want to keep working.
It helps me stand firmly in my decisions because I’m taking everything into account.
Weekly self-reflection 👇
So this week, ask yourself:
Which two needs am I currently struggling to find my way between?
And what comes up when I ask myself these 3 questions?
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